I was waiting for my scan appointment, and trying to ignore the things going on around me. I started going out with my friends, I went to parties and got drunk. I regret that so much now but at the time I just wanted to curl up and stop existing (I wasn't suicidal, I just didn't want to be there anymore) During this time I got to know a lovely man, I'd known him for a while but he was always a friend of a friend until our mutual friend invited me to go clubbing with them. As I got to know Robin better I started to fall in love with him. Before I met Robin I thought I was in love with Xanders biological father, BOY! was I wrong! The day that I went for the scan I broke the news to Robin about being pregnant. I was honest with him, completely, I even told him my fears that I didn't really want a termination. I wanted my baby and for the first time in a year I felt like I had a mind of my own. Robin told me that he wasn't going to dump me just because of the baby, and that it was up to me and noone else whether or not I kept my baby. I'd missed seeing my baby on his first scan, the only memories I have of that scan are my ex saying "It's just a fuzzy blob" and feeling like I was going to be sick because I really didn't want this to happen. 30 minutes after the scan I was on the phone to Robin and I had made the decision to keep Xander. From that moment on Xander had a Daddy and one who, for all his denying it at the time, would love him forever.